Key Highlights

• ABA goals are built around one child, not chosen from a standard list.
• Goal selection starts with an assessment that includes parent interviews, direct observation, and skills testing tools.
• A BCBA weighs safety, daily-life impact, family priorities, your child’s strengths, and the skills your child needs to learn first.
• Good goals are specific, measurable, meaningful, and realistic for your child’s age and abilities.
• Teams focus on a few priority goals at a time rather than trying to teach everything at once.
• Parents have a real voice, and sharing your top concerns helps shape the plan.
• Goals are reviewed regularly and updated as your child grows and masters new skills.

When families start ABA therapy, one of the first questions is often a simple one: who decides what my child will work on? It is a fair question. These goals will shape your child’s time, your family’s routines, and your hopes for the future.

The answer is that goals should be selected through a careful, collaborative process. There is no master list handed to every child. A thoughtful treatment plan reflects who your child is, what your family needs, and what will make the biggest difference in daily life.

This guide explains how ABA goals are selected, what a Board Certified Behavior Analyst (BCBA) considers, what makes a goal good, and how you can take an active role in the process.

The Short Answer: Goals Come From Your Child’s Needs, Strengths, and Your Priorities

ABA goals are selected by combining several pieces of information: a skills assessment, observations of your child, input from parents and caregivers, and the BCBA’s clinical judgment. No single source decides alone.

The BCBA then asks a series of practical questions. What would make your child safer? What would make daily life easier? What is your family hoping for? What does your child already do well? What skills must come first before others can be built?

The result is a short list of priority goals, written in clear and measurable terms, that you review and approve before therapy begins.

Where Goal Selection Starts: The Assessment

Goals begin with information. Before writing a plan, the BCBA gathers a full picture of your child through an assessment, which usually includes several parts.

• A parent or caregiver interview. You know your child better than anyone. The BCBA asks about daily routines, communication, play, sleep, eating, safety concerns, and what a good day and a hard day look like. This conversation often reveals the most important goals.
• Direct observation. The BCBA spends time with your child, often through play and everyday activities, to see how your child communicates, learns, and responds to different situations.
• Skills assessment tools. Many BCBAs use structured tools to measure skills in language, social interaction, learning, play, and daily living. Common examples include the VB-MAPP, the ABLLS-R, and the Vineland. The tools vary by provider and by your child’s age and needs.

Together, these sources show what your child can already do, what they are working toward, and what barriers are getting in the way. With your permission, the BCBA may also speak with teachers or other therapists to see what is happening across settings.

What a BCBA Considers When Choosing Goals

Having a list of possible skills is only the beginning. The BCBA then decides which goals matter most right now. The table below shows common factors and the questions behind them.

Let us look more closely at a few of these.

Safety Comes First

Skills that protect a child from harm usually rise to the top of the list. This might include responding to their name, staying close to a caregiver, stopping when told “stop,” or not leaving a safe area. When safety is a concern, those goals often come before everything else.

Daily-Life Impact

A strong goal makes real life better. The BCBA asks whether a skill will help your child participate in family routines, become more independent, or connect with others. A skill that looks impressive in a session but does not matter at home is rarely a priority.

Family Priorities

Your hopes matter. If the thing that worries you most is that your child cannot tell you what they want, communication will probably be a central goal. If mealtimes are the hardest part of the day, the plan should reflect that. The best plans are built with parents, not handed to them.

Strengths and Interests

Goals are not just about what a child cannot do yet. A good BCBA looks at strengths, such as a good memory, a love of music, or a talent for puzzles, and uses them to teach new skills. Interests make learning feel like play, which helps children stay motivated.

Common Areas Goals May Cover

Every plan is unique, but goals often fall into a few broad areas:

• Communication: requesting, answering questions, using words, signs, pictures, or a device
• Social skills: turn-taking, joining play, and responding to others
• Daily living: dressing, toileting, eating, and hygiene
• Play and leisure: independent play and shared play
• Coping and behavior: asking for breaks, waiting, and handling change
• Learning readiness: following instructions, attending, and group participation

Not every child will have goals in every area, and the balance changes with age and needs.

What Makes a Good ABA Goal?

A well-written goal is specific enough that everyone understands it and clear enough that progress can be measured. A good goal is usually:

• Specific: It describes exactly what the child will do.
• Measurable: There is a way to track progress.
• Meaningful: It improves the child’s daily life.
• Realistic: It fits the child’s current abilities and age.
• Clear about success: The plan states what counts as mastery.

Here is a simple comparison.

• A vague goal: “Improve communication.”
• A clear goal: “When hungry or thirsty, your child will request a preferred item using a word, picture card, or device in at least four out of five opportunities across two settings.”

The second version tells the team, and you, exactly what to teach, how to measure it, and when the goal has been met.

Why Teams Do Not Work on Everything at Once

It can be tempting to want every skill taught immediately. But most plans focus on a limited number of priority goals at a time. Teaching too many things at once can overwhelm a child and make it harder to see what is working.

Instead, the BCBA prioritizes. Safety and high-impact goals come first. As your child masters a skill, the team can introduce the next one. This keeps therapy manageable and builds confidence through steady success.

Your Role in Choosing Goals

Parents are not bystanders in this process. Your insight is essential, and there are simple ways to make it count.

1. Name your top three priorities. Be specific about what is hardest or most important in your child’s day.
2. Share strengths and interests. Tell the team what your child loves.
3. Describe real situations. A short story about a hard morning is more useful than a general statement.
4. Ask why. If a goal seems unclear, ask how it will help your child.
5. Speak up about fit. If a goal does not match your family’s values or needs, say so.

Good questions to ask the BCBA include: How did you choose these goals? Which goals matter most right now? How will we measure progress? When will the goals be reviewed?

A Real Example From Practice

We’ve seen how much family input can shape a plan. In our sessions with one family (we have changed identifying details to protect their privacy), the parents of a four-year-old autistic boy came to the assessment with a long list of concerns: speech, tantrums, toilet training, picky eating, and difficulty at birthday parties.

The BCBA completed the assessment and observed him in play. Rather than writing goals for every concern, the BCBA asked the parents a key question: “If we could change one or two things in the next few months, what would make the biggest difference for your family?”

The parents said their greatest worry was that he could not tell them what he wanted, and that frustration was leading to daily tantrums. That became the first priority. The initial goals focused on requesting favorite items with picture cards and asking for a break. Because he loved cars, those became the first motivators during teaching.

Toileting and food goals were added later, once he was using his picture cards reliably. The family reported that having a clear starting point made the plan feel less overwhelming, and the early success gave them confidence to keep going.

The assessment showed what he could do. The parents’ priorities showed what mattered most. Together, they shaped goals that fit.

How Goals Are Reviewed and Updated

Goal selection is not a one-time event. The BCBA tracks data on every goal, and the team reviews progress regularly. When your child masters a goal, a new one takes its place. If a goal is not progressing, the team looks at why and adjusts the approach, breaks the skill into smaller steps, or changes the goal.

Your family’s needs also change. A new school year, a new baby, or a move can shift what matters most. A good team welcomes those updates and revises the plan accordingly.

Bringing It All Together

So, how are ABA goals selected for each child? Through a thorough assessment, careful observation, honest conversations with parents, and the clinical judgment of a BCBA who weighs safety, daily-life impact, strengths, and family priorities. The result is a plan built around one child, not a template.

At Kennedy ABA, we help autistic children and their families build meaningful skills through compassionate, individualized ABA therapy, and we build every plan with parents so goals reflect what matters most to your family. We proudly serve families across North Carolina, Virginia, Georgia, and Alaska. If you would like to learn how personalized goals could support your child, contact us today. We would be glad to answer your questions and help you take the next step.

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Frequently Asked Questions

1. Who decides my child’s ABA goals?

Goals are developed by the BCBA based on the assessment, observations, and your input. You review and approve the plan, and you can ask questions or request changes.

2. Can I ask for a goal to be added or changed?

Yes. Parents can share new concerns or priorities at any time. The BCBA will consider how the request fits your child’s current needs and may adjust the plan.

3. How many goals will my child work on at once?

It varies, but most plans focus on a limited number of priority goals at a time. Your BCBA will explain how many are recommended for your child and why.

4. What if my child already has an IEP?

IEP goals and ABA goals are separate but can work together. Sharing your IEP with the BCBA helps the team align strategies so skills are practiced in both settings.

5. How often are goals reviewed?

Progress is tracked continuously, and formal reviews usually happen on a regular schedule set by your provider and insurance plan. Ask your BCBA what to expect.

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Sources:

• https://autism.org/screening-assessment/
• https://www.autismspeaks.org/tool-kit/community-based-skills-assessment
• https://www.autismspeaks.org/applied-behavior-analysis
• https://www.motivity.net/blog/aba-goals